New beginnings

Hello!
Semester two has started and so far not so good. I've lost count of all the times I've fallen asleep.

Anyways, updates! I'm 5 weeks post op bone graft surgery. It's been up and down but I'm on the road to recovery so it's a start.

Haven't been swimming for awhile also, winter has not been fun at all so not much has happened. I want to go into hibernation! ^^

Have a great day.

3 weeks out

I've got 3 weeks until end of semester and I'm freaking out. I have doubts of actually finishing the year and I can't seem to let it go at the moment. I can't even get to bed because its going around and around in my head. I need ways to calm the hell down I think.

So I've figured I've put in 1 year and 6 months so far, with 6 months to go. No one ever said it was going to be easy. But I just never realised it was going to be this hard.

Hopefully in a month's time, after this storm has passed, I'll have some better news to pass on.

Swimming is going great per usual, its very calming. Work is the same, need to find something new. I purchased the new Samsung Galaxy S3, works like a charm. =] on a 24 month contract though. Let's see how commitment goes with that one. =p Our kitty is growing up so quick these days! Kinda sad because he was so cute as a kitten.

I hope I have better news next time.

Backsliding ...

Some things don't feel right and some do, generally I'm confused. I feel as if I've lost my way and I've lost control of every aspect of my life, be it work, school or home.

I don't even know what to write or say anymore, I can't even pinpoint the time when everything just went wrong. I just don't know.

I feel like I'm about to lose my mind ...

Bliss ...

Take 2 ... Wish me luck =]

... For you

Love is like the fire that burns within your soul. The deepest passion, the longest journey, and the light that leads the way. It is said that the emotion is felt in an instance and a lifetime to forget. Though you can't see it, you feel it. The thought of losing you was unbearable, having lost you now, no words. For a true love only happens once in a lifetime. Even though Im alone, it doesn't mean Im lonely.

Hello my pretties

So things have been quite busy to be honest.

I can swim/tread water to save my life!

College is going great!

Work is new and exciting every day!

Im thinking about getting a puppy, either a Siberian Husky or an Alaskan Malamute, such gorgeous creatures.

Coz ... I work out!

Good Morning! Its been awhile since I've written anything. I think when I started this 'blog' a few months ago I was confused and lost. But as time passes, it changes people.

So swimming has been very good, I can see progress. As the title states, I've started to work out, so 2012 resolution was to get RIPPED. =]

Work has been excellent. I can't complain.

College has started also, some timetable issues but otherwise sweet.

So with everything that's going on, doesn't leave much room for relax time. Im happy, 2012 will be flying past, before we know it we'll be welcoming 2013.

Just keep swimming =]

So I mentioned earlier, I registered for swim school, and I've been to 2 classes so far. My instructor decided I was ready to move on to the intermediate class. Hoorah!!

This was also the first week in the new job, met some lovely people, overall a great experience. =]

I must admit, this year has just only begun, but so many things have changed, in a good way.

Change is constant, I like it.

Listen to your head, your hearts a fucking idiot.

In a perfect world, I said yes.

In reality, I know the answer should have been no.

Yet, after saying yes, I realised a bit too late. I no longer meant yes anymore.

I feel I've overcome a milestone. Something you wouldn't understand. For you are just a boy.

And again

“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She's not perfect - you aren't either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don't hurt her, don't change her, don't analyze and don't expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she's not there.”

Bob Marley

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”

Federer VS Nadal

The Australian open, what a riveting match that is.

Like everything else, when the balls in your court, you have to make a move. Take a chance. But what if you can't predict where the balls going to land? It can't sit on the net forever. Do you, take a chance? or let it pass by?

If life is about learning and growing, is making a mistake a step towards you becoming a better person?

I just don't think I'm strong enough to accept the mistake when it happens. Once someone hits rock bottom, and slightly recovers, they unconsciously protect and lead themselves away from situations that may guide them back to that dark and lonely place.

I guess that leaves me undecided.

hello old friend

I had the strangest dream lastnight. He was in it again, like usual, but this time it felt more real. It took me back almost a year ago, the same old routine, like nothing has changed.

I always say, there is only one constant in everyone's life, and that, in fact, is change.

Be the change you want to see in the world. Don't sit around waiting for someone or something to do it for you, take the lead in your own life, I feel we are all entitled to that.

Emotions are what makes us humans weak. Not a soul will ever get close enough to make me fall again.

Thoughts?

So, Im blogging. Its like taking a step 5 years back, or something similar.

I removed my Facebook account, I don't like social networking, you're not really networking, people just want to look like they have a lot of friends. Plus I find people tend to rant on about the little things in life, etc etc. A mindless babble without really thinking about the consequences.

Moving along, college starts soon enough so Im taking a mini vacation to the north coast. Life is blissful I must say. =]

Cheerio

What's your number?

So I watched 'What's your number?' today. It's one of those feel good movies, where the girl falls in love with the guy she least expects, he's a diamond in the rough you could say?

Anyways, I guess in a way I had that, I'm not saying I'm at 20, but what I am saying is that I thought I had fallen in love with a guy that wanted to change his ways. I guess with movies, they always end happily ever after, but if the movie had gone on for any longer, life would have happened, and like they say, you can't teach an old dog new tricks.

Life goes on right? I think I'm that much closer to becoming the crazy cat lady, something I've definately accepted.

Anything is possible

Since 2011 finished with a bang, mind you, with no 'new years resolution' list made (due to my own commitment issues). I think 2012 is a time for change and to write a list, of achievable goals, so this time, next year, I can reflect and see that maybe I can overcome my commitment issues.

• Overcome commitment issues - DONE, I'm writing a list that forsees my future.
• I'm in my last year of studies, so I hope to complete that this year.
• Learn to swim, I registered for swim classes today!
• New Job - DONE, I start in a couple of weeks.
• No online shopping ... Unless necessary?
• Go overseas - If my school/work timetable allows for it.

I feel my quest will be achievable, as long as a stop saying I will do it, and just do it. Fingers crossed for now I guess.

Time to start writing again....

Many years ago I learnt that writing was a very powerful tool used to express some things that were too difficult to say. I am weak, therefore I am human. I feel I have a disability with the English language and at times dont have the correct words for conversing ...

These days I still manage to find the spare minute or 10 pondering about life and what I can do to make a difference. I don't think I actually want to make a difference, I want life to change me ... for the better.